Chapter Ten: The Pathophobic

True Story:

I have never been sick as often as I have been since I started working at (insert popular drugstore chain name). I mean, it makes sense. It's a pharmacy, so most of my customers are sick. So when I had to go into work while sick b/c no one was able to cover, I should have prepared myself for what I would encounter.

I should explain that I wore my hair up.

No make up.

A nose brighter than Rudolph's.

Eyes glazed over.

Tissues stuffed in my fleece pockets.

Armed with hand sanitizer.

I mostly heard "Oh! You're sick?! Feel better."

I often heard "You know how to get rid of that, right? Vitamin C."

And I never grew tired of "You look terrible. Why are you here?"

But my most memorable experience through this hazy day was with a middle-aged woman, who I later diagnosed as a pathophobic (someone who is afraid of getting an illness).

She came up to the register and piled everything on the counter.

I began scanning the items and bagging them. I told her what her total was.

And she just looked at me and said "See. You're sick. And now I have to touch that stuff."

"I'm very sorry," I apologized. "I've been using a lot of hand sanitizer today, I assure you."

She paid, grabbed her stuff and left.

The next morning, she came back to return an item. And she was mortified to see that I was still employed at the store. I quickly gave her a refund and sent her on her way.

No more than three hours later, she returned.However, it was hard to recognize her. She had a sweatshirt on, hood up, gloves (this story is a few months old; and I'm telling you - the gloves weren't necessary), and a medical mask that covered most of her face... And I know that entire week is one giant blur, but I swear she looked almost like the lady in this picture. Any national quarantine crisis would be lucky to have her. She approached the line and bought something new. When I finally noticed it was the same woman from before, my jaw dropped. She wouldn't look me in the eye. And she was on the move, like her speed would somehow keep her healthy. I felt as if I'd been shunned and direct eye contact would have sentenced her to death or hell for sure.

It's probably best. Had she stayed any longer, I may have felt a sudden urge to cough.