Saturday, October 9, 2010
Chapter Eight: 'I Like Turtles'
Okay - I'm sure no one else will find this funny... I'm also sure I'm the only one who finds any of these stories funny... but this morning, I was ringing up merchandise for an older gentleman and I asked my routine question "How are you doing today?" His response? "I have warts on my feet." Wow. Thanks for sharing. I laughed because, in my opinion, that has nothing to do with what I asked. For the rest of that particular transaction, I kept replaying the youtube video of the boy who completely disregarded the anchorwoman's question and gave some random and unnecessary information. I laughed because I knew what that anchorwoman felt like. I also laughed because - well, I was sleep-deprived and sick of the mundane same ole morning routine and NEEDED something to get me through. Watch the youtube video of the little boy. It's funny - much much funnier than my version.
Chapter Seven: The Telepathist
So with all those new movies coming out in the last decade where superheros are everywhere - and they are the everyday man (i.e. Batman, Spiderman, Iron Man, and even arguably, Unbreakable), I was only slightly surprised when I encountered one today at work.
It is Sign Saturday (as I like to call it), the day we change our sale signs. I was busy in aisle 4, sticking those bright colored tabs on every label in sight, when a man approached me from the right side. He was an older gentleman, and I could only see him out of the corner of my eye at first. He stood three feet away, and I could feel him watching me. I looked up, and quickly returned my attention to the price labels, as staring is somehow a normal occurance at this store. When he didn't look away or turn his attention elsewhere, I looked back at him. He was just staring at me. This is when the mind talk must have began, because he wasn't moving his lips, but he clearly needed something. He must have mistaken me for a telepathist too, because the blank staring continued - but only for a few short seconds before I chimed in with actual words: "Can I help you with something." He stalled then simply replied "yes." He must have gotten confused again because he stood silent, forgetting that I am not a mind reader. "What do you need?" I asked. Another short moment of silence. Giving up on having a conversation with a non- Superhero, he looked behind him at his wife. So - I approached his wife, and, to my advantage, she does not use telepathy like her husband does. She formed whole sentences and told me what she needed and I was able to help her find what she was looking for.
It just makes me wonder: Who does that man talk to if he's the only telepathist??
It is Sign Saturday (as I like to call it), the day we change our sale signs. I was busy in aisle 4, sticking those bright colored tabs on every label in sight, when a man approached me from the right side. He was an older gentleman, and I could only see him out of the corner of my eye at first. He stood three feet away, and I could feel him watching me. I looked up, and quickly returned my attention to the price labels, as staring is somehow a normal occurance at this store. When he didn't look away or turn his attention elsewhere, I looked back at him. He was just staring at me. This is when the mind talk must have began, because he wasn't moving his lips, but he clearly needed something. He must have mistaken me for a telepathist too, because the blank staring continued - but only for a few short seconds before I chimed in with actual words: "Can I help you with something." He stalled then simply replied "yes." He must have gotten confused again because he stood silent, forgetting that I am not a mind reader. "What do you need?" I asked. Another short moment of silence. Giving up on having a conversation with a non- Superhero, he looked behind him at his wife. So - I approached his wife, and, to my advantage, she does not use telepathy like her husband does. She formed whole sentences and told me what she needed and I was able to help her find what she was looking for.
It just makes me wonder: Who does that man talk to if he's the only telepathist??
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